Written By : Komal Tiwari
Edited & Posted On : 11/03/2023
Body shaming cannot be acknowledged whatever the age of its victim is.
In Indian society being fat or obese is a stigma for girls. From childhood onwards, the ones who are on the heavier side start getting their lessons on “Patle Ho Jao” (lose weight). Not only parents, grandparents, immediate relatives, but neighbors and teachers at school constantly nag them for weight issues.
These overweight female children become a source of entertainment for everyone in society. They are always laughed at.
No one acknowledges the other capabilities they have. People usually think that these kids are overweight due to eating more. They are worried about their diet as if they are paying for the food in their plate. They are also worried that how these kids will find the right match for marriage when they grow up.
No one thinks about these abuse victims’ state of mind. People will do everything to tear their soul apart, shatter their confidence, trample there innate qualities, bruise their conscience and shove them into endless and deepest ocean of grief and agony. All this evil for what? For making them find a suitable spouse? That’s so ironical and farcical. This is the clear image of our weight obsessed absurd Indian society.
Body shaming cannot be acknowledged whatever the age of its victim is. People of all ages and sexes bear the brunt of it, but seeing young and innocent souls going through it is very agonizing.
Rather than tattering their mind and showing false concerns about their weight, we should be worried about nurturing them right, educating them, making them self dependent and self sustaining and encouraging them to excel in their innate skills and creativities. And all this is the family’s cup of tea, nobody else’s.
People know only one cause of obesity. And that is eating more! People, try to think beyond that. There are various factors that decide human weight. The most important one is person’s genetic makeup and family history. Others are psychological factors and the environmental changes. It may also be the outcome of a disease they once had. There may be other undefined and unexplained causes.
This is my female clients’ bugaboo too. They often share their stories how they are commented on their weight at home, at office, at shops, at banks, at college, wherever on earth they go. And how many times, they have to bear stranger’s nonsense talk on weight loss tips or the dialogue “Aap Kuch Karte Kyon Nahin”(Why don’t you do something about your weight)? Some of my clients often encounter quacks selling weight loss supplements, begging them to buy their products. I have some clients who are frequently badgered by their moms-in-law for being fat.
It was my friend’s daughter’s teacher’s opinion about her weight (she is plump) that made me write this piece. Her teacher gave the class an assignment on nutrition. She excelled (she is a born genius) in it and the teacher praised her but the teacher also said that if she knows so much about nutrition, why doesn’t she follow it and get thin. Teacher’s judgmental and insensible remarks broke the spirit of the kid. Although, this hadn’t happened to her for the first time but this was coming from the teacher in front of the whole class. Later her fellow classmates made a hearty fun of her. The kid was feeling blue and refused to eat anything that day. Her mother (my friend) then brought her to me for counseling. The teacher’s stupendous stupidity and insensitivity amazed me.
How could she say that without knowing the child’s exact health status?
In our society, we never encourage our kids to indulge in physical activities or outdoor sports. We always want them to study and only study because every parent wants a doctor or an engineer in the house. We expect them to have polished occupations and careers in their adulthood, but we never expect them to grow into healthful adults who care enough for themselves. We need to change our mindset.
We tell our children to get involved in sports only when we realize that they have started putting on more and more weight. Else we are at peace pampering them with video games and play stations. We don’t mind if they keep watching cartoons for hours and hours all together on TV. Children always follow their parent’s footsteps. So if you, as parent, have never exercised or involved yourself in corporeal tasks, how do you expect your child to do so? After all they are growing up observing you as a couch potato.
And who made them taste that pizza, noodles, burger and all those unhealthy chemical laden sweet treats for the first ever time in life. It’s you and only you! At that time you are busy pampering them without thinking of the aftermath of these affectionate concerns of yourself.
It becomes parent’s duty to feed the children nutrition packed balanced meals from the very first day of their life. It’s difficult to unlearn something that has been learnt in childhood. According to Indian way of life, we teach morals and ethics to our kids through stories. We need to convey them the importance of nutrition in the same way. Else get ready to see them as unhealthy adults with various deficiencies and diseases.
It’s of utmost importance for us to raise our daughters in the rightful way. We should never feed them with the fear of being obese. We should love them, teach them the incredibility of sound health and nurture them.